I am still so sad and stunned to know that she is gone. It just doesn't feel real to me. Whitney Houston was a Goddess in my eyes all throughout my childhood. Her big beautiful voice was my single biggest musical inspiration growing up and it echos in my own sound today.
When I was just getting started in Boston about 9 or 10 years ago I met a few times with Whitney's former manager (he launched her career and managed her first ten years). He thought that I might make a great "Whitney for today" and wanted to work with me.
I thought so carefully about it, and I backed away from the prospect in the end. First I thanked him so much (I was way beyond flattered) but I didn't feel that her particular career path was one that I should follow. It didn’t seem to add up to happiness from my perspective.
My friends and family thought I was possibly making a huge mistake... but felt sure, and I felt it very deeply. Where they saw fame and fortune, I saw isolation, restrictions and unhealthy pressure. It all seemed so lonely. How could any artist really bloom in that kind of environment? I see the same thing again and again blatantly on display via reality shows like American Idol.
...look this way. move this way. stand this way. sing this way. dance this way. make more money...
And there is this blatant double standard: Be authentic -vs- Be what I want you to be.
It’s an impossibility. Ask "Lana Del Rey".
It is way too easy to stray from ones own authentic path- To make decisions based on the needs and wants of many who do not have your own best interests in mind. To push oneself toward an imbalanced and unrealistic image of perfection.
I can only hope that more people begin to recognize this madness and let go of the the things that drive us to speed up when we need to slow down. That we may all begin to listen to our hearts and see that we can and should enjoy our own path. That we may learn to love and trust ourselves.
I was 8 years old when I sang “The Greatest Love of All” at my Godfathers engagement party. I wanted so much to sound like Whitney. I tried with all of my little girl might to capture the confidence and strength in her voice. It could surely move mountains. There was so much LOVE in there. So much love.
May that love carry on in all of our hearts.
May we all strive to share it.
May it grow and continue to grow forever.
Rest in Peace Whitney Houston.
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